Senior Sex: How To Transition Your Aging Clients Into a New Era of Libido & Passion

In your practice as a sex and relationship coach, many clients who show up on your doorstep or your Zoom screen are likely to be older. That is exactly why you need to know about, and be comfortable with, senior sex.

Because sex can often be a taboo topic, people avoid addressing it until later in life. And sexual issues generally also become more prevalent as we age. For example there is a strong negative correlation between libido and age, with people’s sexual desire diminishing as they age.

Yet, although desire may ebb with the passage of time, new opportunities can unfold for older adults to cultivate vibrant, fulfilling sex lives. As we mature, a palpable shift occurs — a shedding of inhibitions, a deepening comfort within one’s own skin. Consequently, aging emerges not merely as a period of decline, but as a chapter brimming with potential for sexual growth.

It is within this context that we have added the “Sexuality and Aging” specialization to our Somatica Coaching Curriculum.

As a sex and relationship coach, equipping yourself with a comprehensive toolkit is paramount. Ensuring that aging clients have access to pertinent information and resources is a cornerstone of fostering a healthy and gratifying sex life.

Within the specialization onto senior sex, you’ll learn about the realm of hormonal changes and their effects. This encompasses the nuanced shifts accompanying perimenopause, menopause, and andropause in older adults. Equipped with this understanding, you’ll emerge as a proficient sounding board and advocate for your clients.

Although you won’t be dispensing medical advice, there’s a significant need for empathetic support in navigating personal needs and anxieties, particularly around things like hormone replacement therapy. Clients may seek guidance from their medical practitioners initially, but then are likely to turn to you to talk through their goals and the most suitable approaches to pursue.

By educating yourself about the spectrum of available options, you can empower your clients to better engage with their healthcare providers. Armed with pertinent questions, they’ll be able to more effectively advocate for themselves. 

You can also help your clients work through any disappointments and shifts relating to changes in their libido or other physical changes that affect their sex life. As their cheerleader, you can encourage lifestyle choices that positively influence libido, such as regular exercise, a healthy diet, and self-care practices.

Reframing Sexual Expectations

In navigating the terrain of sexuality and aging with your clients, your role includes reframing expectations around sexual performance as they age. 

You can guide them to see that the natural evolution of their bodies over time is quite normal. Empowering them to embrace newfound capacities, you can nudge them to explore different kinds of experiences and sensations. And through this journey, they will realize that a remarkable sex life remains within their grasp.

Exploring Different Types of Intimacy 

For many people, the concept of sex has long been synonymous with intercourse or genital stimulation

As people age however, there’s a profound potential for more pleasure through diversifying their intimate experiences. Encouraging exploration beyond traditional sexual norms can unlock avenues for creativity, playfulness, and holistic pleasure – not just physical, but emotional and spiritual as well.

This broader spectrum of intimacy may encompass emotional and sexual connection through verbalization, sensual touch, erotic massage, and shared fantasies. Introducing novelty and embracing sensuality often serve as catalysts for rejuvenated experiences, so cultivating this multifaceted approach empowers your clients to navigate the aging process with a new swing in their step.

Introducing New Pleasure Zones

While acceptance work may need to be done around our changing bodies as we age, as a coach, you have the opportunity to help people expand into different and new forms of pleasure.

For example, people with vulvas can learn how to orgasm in multiple ways. Erogenous zones, like the G Spot, might become more active and awake later in life. If they practice with different kinds of stimulation, they may find heights of pleasure they haven’t experienced before. Penis owners can learn about the pleasures that can be had through Perineum massage and touch on a non-erect penis. 

Some older clients likely have shame or discomfort with masturbation. Normalizing and encouraging the exploration of solo sex as a healthy and natural part of sexual well-being is part of our work. Promoting self-exploration and fostering an understanding of their own desires and preferences can unlock pathways for rediscovering what brings them pleasure.

Addressing Erectile Dysfunction

As men age, one experience that becomes more common is erectile dysfunction (ED). It can manifest through hormonal changes, or medication commonly associated with aging like those for heart or diabetes management. It can also be the result of prostate surgery to address prostate cancer. 

Keep in mind that experiencing ED can be the catalyst for your clients to consider exploring different types of intimacy. So for coaches catering to aging clients, taking our specialized training on dysfunction is recommended. 

Equipping yourself with strategies to navigate ED and its implications can ensure you know how to work with these issues when presented, and empower your clients around them. 

One of the really fun and exciting parts of being a Somatica sex and relationship coach is helping people understand their Core Desires and Hottest Sexual Movies. This knowledge becomes increasingly vital, particularly for clients seeking to enhance their sexual experiences in those later stages of life.

Your clients are going to require a vocabulary to navigate discussions about their evolving bodies and desires. Plus, they’ll need some guidance on the types of conversations they should be having. 

For clients in long-term relationships, aiding them in communicating about challenges or changes in their relationship dynamics is crucial. This encompasses adjustments in roles and responsibilities as well.

Retirement brings many changes, as do alterations in health. Older adults need to learn how to flow with these if they are going to keep a strong emotional and sexual connection. Exploring Relationship Design, another specialization we offer, may also be useful for assessing whether a redesign or update is warranted.

Positive Body Image

Finally, aging can bring up all sorts of body image issues that people may not have had in the past. 

You may want to look into our Body Image specialization as another key area to be prepared around when working with sexuality and aging.

Be The Most Amazing Coaches to Your Senior Clients

If you want to guide your clients to gracefully embrace their golden years while maintaining a vibrant, connected and fulfilling sex life, come join the Somatica Training. We’ll teach you the skills to support your clients through every stage of life.

The Next Somatica Certification Training
Begins April 19, 2024!

Join us and master the art of Transformation Through Pleasure™.
Become an in-demand sex & relationship coach and watch your own life transform in the process.