In this series we introduce how finding the genre of your “Hottest Sexual Movie” is an important tool for self-discovery, for you and your clients. Having this vocabulary is a means to communicate desires to a partner in a way that is playful, non-judgemental and future-focused. Previously, we broke down the details of “The Romantic Movie” and what core desires it addresses. Whereas the romantic movie is about feeling deeply loved, the passionate story is about intense, insatiable desire. Rather than appealing to our very human need to feel seen and understood, the passionate story is about allowing unexplained, uncontrollable animalistic desire taking hold. In our Somatica Trainings we offer a journey of self-discovery where you have permission to explore all kinds of fantasies while learning the tools you will need to allow others to explore and share.
The passionate hottest sexual movie is about a connection that is a bit out of control. In modern western society, we spend years socializing our children out of animal-like behavior in order for them to behave. When the self-conscious part of your brain that tells you that you must behave can be silenced, then passion begins. There it was all along, the sensory part of you that wants to bite, grab, growl, and satisfy all of your needs. In our sexually repressed culture, many people fantasize about having passion overtake them and their lovers. The passionate sexual movie is a very common fantasy because it allows you to go beyond the constraints of being nice and compliant which, in turn, allows you to feel truly alive in your body.
Whether or not this appeals to you in theory, giving yourself permission to have experiences that are sensory and uninhibited can feel liberating. Allowing clients to explore this side of themselves can be profoundly healing and we have helped many couples try out passionate fantasies starting with something as simple as a kiss.
No action captures the essence of the passionate story more than a passionate kiss. When done right, it can express an overwhelming amount of desire and promise. We have helped many clients reignite passion on multiple levels just by nailing this one important experience.
Here are the basics of delivering a killer, Passionate Kiss:
The Look: It is important to begin with a passionate look, letting all of the animalistic desire come into your eyes and holding it.
The Build Up: Waiting before jumping into a kiss builds tension and lets you sit in the uncertainty of whether or not all the passion will be met. If you go too quickly to the kiss, you don’t allow tension and excitement to build. By waiting, you allow yourself and your lover to build to a frenzy of desire where you can’t rip each other’s clothes off fast enough.
The Delivery: Don’t be afraid to grab hair, a collar, or the back of their head and really let yourself express your passion with your mouth and tongue but also with your entire body pressed against theirs. If you feel like giving a little lip nibble- got for it.
We promise you won’t regret where this kiss can lead. Here is a story one of our male clients told us about his girlfriend’s passionate approach to sex:
Usually my girlfriend seems to be more into romance, but every once in awhile it’s like she’s possessed. It sometimes happens on vacation or when something really great happens in her life. I know it’s happening because she gets this look in her eye like I’m just a piece of meat. I know women might not like feeling like a piece of meat and, to be honest, the first time I saw it I was a little surprised, but I definitely don’t mind feeling like a piece of meat. This one time, she walked in the door wearing this really tight, sexy dress and she had that look in her eyes. Before she even got to me, she started taking her clothes off, and she just pushed me down on the bed. She started kissing me and grabbing me and taking my clothes off. She took my hands and started moving them all over her body, encouraging me to grab her ass and her nipples really hard. I could feel her grinding on me…
You get the picture. As you start to see what genre most appeals to you, don’t forget that you can always incorporate various elements of each into your special mix and encourage others to do the same. Romance and passion often go hand and hand and we give you a template for how to seamlessly integrate multiple fantasy types into your sexual encounters and to help clients do the same. Find out more about what you will learn in the Somatica Training here!
Also, check out our post on the “Dominant/submissive” movie that uses energy, gestures, and words to play with power and its relinquishment.
Celeste Hirschman, M.A. is the co-creator of the Somatica® Method, and the co-founder of the Somatica Institute.
She trains coaches in the Somatica Method, and has her own private practice in San Francisco.
Celeste is also the co-producer of the TV program Here She Comes - an episodic based on the Somatica Method that is currently in production.
As an author, she has written multiple academic articles in peer-reviewed journals and three books: Cockfidence, Making Love Real, and Coming Together.
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